Create a custom theme
0
Fightstar: You are not, and never will be, FFAF
Posted by
,
06 February 2005
·
56 views
There's this great band called Funeral for a Friend. They make wicked cool emo music. Anyone wanting a sample of what I'm rambling on about I suggest listening to 'She drove me to daytime television', 'bullet theory', 'Juneau' or 'Escape Artists Never Die'. Funeral for a Friend rock, they kick ass.
Then there's Busted. Those who don't know Busted I suggest my former entry "Busted are the Worst Group in the World Ever". Busted desperately wanted to be Blink 182, forgetting that Blink 182 themselves are talentless bums. Busted wanted to ROCK! OK Busted, you do not rock when you went to private school, the same private school as Ian Hislop. That's just sad. True rock can only be achieved by those from hilariously conservative, but deprived, backgrounds. Take Lemmy.
As you can see Lemmy is the ugliest geezer on the planet. Yet he has shagged hundreds of women, cos he's Lemmy. Lemmy is a legend! Lemmy is lead singer of Motorhead, thems who did 'Ace of Spades' possibly the most frantic and fun metal single of all time. Lemmy is metal as hell. Lemmy kicks ass. They did a blood sample of Lemmy once, and discovered that he could never give or receive blood because there are so many drugs milling around in his blood stream now that his blood is technically categorised as poisonous. Lemmy- a role model for us all. Yet where does Lemmy come from? Lemmy's dad was a clergyman. Now THATS rock.
Not going to private school and then singing about the Year 3,000, oh and just to make sure everyone knows how rebellious we are we'll sing about triple-breasted women. OOOOOO GET YOU YOU ######ING COCKS!!!!!
That's nothing you morons! Elvis Presley used to shove a hosepipe down his trousers on stage in order to make comments about his organ. Mick Jagger off Rolling Stones fame used to snort coke on stage, and then there's the bat related fun of Ozzy Osbourne (he who tried to murder his wife) and Alive Cooper. These people are much more controversial and rock than you and they were around 50, 40 and 20 years ago respectively! In fact here's a nice story that illustrates how metal Ozzy is. During Ozzy's early career he was a bit strapped for cash. So he decided to steal some stuff. Someone told Ozzy that if he wore gloves then his fingerprints wouldn't show and he wouldn't get arrested. But Ozzy, being truly metal, wore fingerless gloves! See THAT'S METAL!
Anyways I've gone on a bit of a tangent here. Anyway recently Busted split up (to the pleasure of humans with functioning eardrums everywhere) and Charlie, lead singer of Busted formed a new band, Fightstar. What kind of rock name is 'Charlie' anyway. Yeah Ozzy Osbourne, Alice Cooper, Lemmy and 'Charlie'. Oooo watch out! Charlies coming to get you! Yeah that'll stir up controversy with religious zealots and upset mainstream society! OH NO! NOT CHARLIE! The only people it'd upset would be crazy Vietnam Veterans. Which begs a question, what happens if Vietnam Soldiers were called 'Charlie', 'WATCH OUT CHARLIE! ITS CHARLIE!' and then by the time he's worked out what the hells going on he's got 20 bullets lodged in his skull. Man, that's tough. And even the corpse would be more rocking than Fightstar!
I happened to catch the 'Friday Night Project', on, amazingly, Friday. I watched it because it had Jimmy Carr on it, and he's a poncy upper middle class git who's made it his lifes work to make other people feel bad about themselves. Not unlike myself. Fightstar happened to the band this week, and oh boy did they suck. If you took Funeral for a Friend, removed the ability to play their instruments and made them look like their plans for next week were to start puberty then you would have Fightstar. It is of course possible that I WANTED Fightstar to suck, because they are basically Busted Mark 2, but I'm gradually coming to the conclusion that yes they do actually suck that much.
Ahh another great genre of music turned into pap by Marketing Execs wishing to strip all innovation and soul from music in order to sell it to 8 year girls and morons.
I bet Sam likes them.
Then there's Busted. Those who don't know Busted I suggest my former entry "Busted are the Worst Group in the World Ever". Busted desperately wanted to be Blink 182, forgetting that Blink 182 themselves are talentless bums. Busted wanted to ROCK! OK Busted, you do not rock when you went to private school, the same private school as Ian Hislop. That's just sad. True rock can only be achieved by those from hilariously conservative, but deprived, backgrounds. Take Lemmy.
As you can see Lemmy is the ugliest geezer on the planet. Yet he has shagged hundreds of women, cos he's Lemmy. Lemmy is a legend! Lemmy is lead singer of Motorhead, thems who did 'Ace of Spades' possibly the most frantic and fun metal single of all time. Lemmy is metal as hell. Lemmy kicks ass. They did a blood sample of Lemmy once, and discovered that he could never give or receive blood because there are so many drugs milling around in his blood stream now that his blood is technically categorised as poisonous. Lemmy- a role model for us all. Yet where does Lemmy come from? Lemmy's dad was a clergyman. Now THATS rock.
Not going to private school and then singing about the Year 3,000, oh and just to make sure everyone knows how rebellious we are we'll sing about triple-breasted women. OOOOOO GET YOU YOU ######ING COCKS!!!!!
That's nothing you morons! Elvis Presley used to shove a hosepipe down his trousers on stage in order to make comments about his organ. Mick Jagger off Rolling Stones fame used to snort coke on stage, and then there's the bat related fun of Ozzy Osbourne (he who tried to murder his wife) and Alive Cooper. These people are much more controversial and rock than you and they were around 50, 40 and 20 years ago respectively! In fact here's a nice story that illustrates how metal Ozzy is. During Ozzy's early career he was a bit strapped for cash. So he decided to steal some stuff. Someone told Ozzy that if he wore gloves then his fingerprints wouldn't show and he wouldn't get arrested. But Ozzy, being truly metal, wore fingerless gloves! See THAT'S METAL!
Anyways I've gone on a bit of a tangent here. Anyway recently Busted split up (to the pleasure of humans with functioning eardrums everywhere) and Charlie, lead singer of Busted formed a new band, Fightstar. What kind of rock name is 'Charlie' anyway. Yeah Ozzy Osbourne, Alice Cooper, Lemmy and 'Charlie'. Oooo watch out! Charlies coming to get you! Yeah that'll stir up controversy with religious zealots and upset mainstream society! OH NO! NOT CHARLIE! The only people it'd upset would be crazy Vietnam Veterans. Which begs a question, what happens if Vietnam Soldiers were called 'Charlie', 'WATCH OUT CHARLIE! ITS CHARLIE!' and then by the time he's worked out what the hells going on he's got 20 bullets lodged in his skull. Man, that's tough. And even the corpse would be more rocking than Fightstar!
I happened to catch the 'Friday Night Project', on, amazingly, Friday. I watched it because it had Jimmy Carr on it, and he's a poncy upper middle class git who's made it his lifes work to make other people feel bad about themselves. Not unlike myself. Fightstar happened to the band this week, and oh boy did they suck. If you took Funeral for a Friend, removed the ability to play their instruments and made them look like their plans for next week were to start puberty then you would have Fightstar. It is of course possible that I WANTED Fightstar to suck, because they are basically Busted Mark 2, but I'm gradually coming to the conclusion that yes they do actually suck that much.
Ahh another great genre of music turned into pap by Marketing Execs wishing to strip all innovation and soul from music in order to sell it to 8 year girls and morons.
I bet Sam likes them.
I listen to his old stuff loads. 
Obviously not true. You may not like their music but they are not talentless.
Same reason why I decided to watch it.
And yes, Fightstar did suck.