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I have News
Posted by
,
31 March 2005
·
75 views
My dear friends. I have been posting here for some time, and blogging too, but now I realise the truth. That my sarcastic gabs were the work of Lucifer. I have found God.
I realise now how wrong I was. It is obvious that Satan guided my actions while I believed in such evils as excellent social services, and respecting others beliefs. I believe now that the only way we as a species can progress is through belief in the Almighty, unquestioning patriotism and making sure that the poor live as short a lives as possible so that they can all go to hell quicker.
I realise now that Homosexuality is a disease, much like chickenpox. I realise now too that God meant for George Bush to invade Iraq, and I see his work throughout the Earth. Yes, surely George Bush was sent by God to lead us into a new era.
I especially realise my concerns over civil libertys were silly. For as an agent of God George Bush carries out of the wisdom of the almighty.
I've decided to give up the evils of masturbation and other pleasures of the flesh for the pleasure of being close to God in a monastery. God be with you all.
If you haven't worked out that this is an April Fools joke yet you should contact your doctor for signs of retardation.
I realise now how wrong I was. It is obvious that Satan guided my actions while I believed in such evils as excellent social services, and respecting others beliefs. I believe now that the only way we as a species can progress is through belief in the Almighty, unquestioning patriotism and making sure that the poor live as short a lives as possible so that they can all go to hell quicker.
I realise now that Homosexuality is a disease, much like chickenpox. I realise now too that God meant for George Bush to invade Iraq, and I see his work throughout the Earth. Yes, surely George Bush was sent by God to lead us into a new era.
I especially realise my concerns over civil libertys were silly. For as an agent of God George Bush carries out of the wisdom of the almighty.
I've decided to give up the evils of masturbation and other pleasures of the flesh for the pleasure of being close to God in a monastery. God be with you all.
If you haven't worked out that this is an April Fools joke yet you should contact your doctor for signs of retardation.
